An Open Letter to My Foreigner Self

Dear Foreigner Self,

Hi, yeah, it’s me again. Even though you keep saying that Singapore takes a lot less adjusting to than other countries, it’s still going to take some. And I wanted to tell you that it’s all right to be that “stupid foreigner.”  In fact, you might as well just accept that it’s pretty much unavoidable with these kinds of long-term adventures.

I know it felt awful when your pupils laughed at you because you couldn’t pronounce their Chinese names, even though you asked them up front to be patient with you.  I mean, after all, English speakers have never had a great relationship with the letters “Q” and “X.” “Wang Qiang” and “Li Xiu” don’t exactly roll off your tongue very easily and that’s okay. You will learn (hopefully) . . . or maybe your students will just have to accept that the best they’re going to get is a weird approximation like “Wing Kwookig” or “Loo Shoe.”

About those times when your temporary landlady looked at you like you had two heads, try not to worry too much.  After all, how were you supposed to know that you needed “house slippers,” that soap was not used for washing your hands after you used the toilet, or that yogurt and two miniature apples for breakfast was a very inferior, small breakfast in comparison to noodles? Well, you bought the house slippers and the soap, offered an explanation for the size of your breakfast, and gratefully took a bowl of breakfast porridge. What else could you do?

Oh and as concerns the incident in the doughnut shop, I should just forget about it. So what if you brusquely grabbed the wrong pair of tongs from the cashier’s counter and the clerk gave you that unimpressed look, made a fuss, and shooed you in the right direction? She’s probably forgotten about by now. If she hasn't, next week when you go in, maybe she’ll be impressed that you can now get your doughnuts in the correct manner.   

So, Foreigner Self, when you find yourself with the common sense to realize your own mistakes, take heart. Tell yourself what you tell your students - that it’s okay because you’re learning!

Until Our Next Heart-to-Heart,

Yourself